One of the biggest challenges has been facing for the first time the loss of a loved one while being away from family. It's challenging to go through the process of grieving the loss of G'pa Ed and trying to heal while being away from home and family. No one else here is facing the same loss, so it is natural for life to go on like normal. However, my heart sometimes falters and stumbles as it tries to move forward with the pace of life and responsibilities. I miss him very much, and it is very lonely at times. But at the same time there is a sweetness about being broken and alone... with Brother. He also was broken and alone. And my feelings of loss and separation cannot even BEGIN to compare with the excruciating degree of isolation my Savior felt as the Father turned his face away and as the Sorrow of the entire world fell on His shoulders while He struggled to take in His last breaths. My Grandpa Ed also died in an excruciating battle for his last breaths, but he used each one intentionally to cheer us up and let us know we were loved. His death was a beautiful picture of the Savior He preached about each Sunday. I wish you all could have known him. He left a legacy of a life lived well.
One of the things I wish I could ask Grandpa about is His boldness in proclaiming the Good News to anyone and everyone who would listen. I remember once on one of my breaks from college, I went out to breakfast with G'ma and G'pa- as was our custom. We went to Pete's Koney Island. As we sat there, enjoying our conversation, a man rolled past our table in a wheelchair. He was a little rough looking around the edges- deep, hard wrinkles in his face, rough skin, and a baseball cap. But boy, did he want to talk. It seemed he was just starving for someone to listen to him. He rolled up and down the restaurant, saying hi to people at the booths. Most of them just ignored or said a quick hello and quickly stuffed another bite in their mouths to look busy or occupied. Then he got around to our booth. Immediately, he looked comfortable there. Because there was Grandpa, just smiling and nodding in assurance that he was listening. I kept waiting for Grandpa to wrap up the conversation with this man so we could get back to our breakfast together. But instead, he kept asking HIM questions to keep the talk going. He asked the man about himself, his interests, his life. I have to admit, I was a bit miffed because I had plenty that I wanted to tell my Grandma and Grandpa... and I wanted to get back to our visit. After all, I was only home for a week or two. But I distinctly remember, after several minutes of conversation, Grandpa Ed looked straight into the eyes of this quarky old man and asked him clearly by name, "Do you know Brother?" I do not remember the man's exact response, but I will never forget that moment. My Grandpa Ed never wanted to waste any opportunity. Where others may have seen a looney old man, Grandpa saw a lost soul. And I want that kind of boldness. If Grandpa were still here, I'd ask him how to get that kind of boldness in speech. And I think he would tell me, "If any of you lacks wisdom, he should ask God, who gives generously without finding fault..." My Grandpa truly lived out Romans 1:16- He was never ashamed of the Good News because he knew it was the power of Dad for salvation.
Even through the challenges and lonely moments of a healing heart, Dad has given me so much.
Over Christmas, I was able to visit Mt. Sinai and the Red Sea. What a neat experience to be able to climb to the top and look down into the valley and imagine the whole nation of Israel, waiting for Moses to come back down so they could hear what the Dad of Israel had to say. It made the whole story come alive in a different way- feeling how the people must have felt trying to climb around those huge rocks in the steaming hot sun with their women and children and animals. I can understand a little more now why the people were so whiny sometimes. I think I would have been too. We were also able to ride down the beach of the Red Sea on some camels. How fun is that? :) What an amusing animal they are.
Over Coptic Christmas (Jan.7th, the day the Coptic Christians celebrate) I was able to travel with my Egyptian friends Najwa and Nadia to spend the day with their friend Fariel's family. It was a lovely day of just visiting, sharing food and playing with their two adorable kids. That is one fun thing to observe- no matter how crazy or different most things are in this foreign culture, KIDS will always be the same. I sat there watching the little 4 year old girl in her pigtails, playing with her Dad- asking him (in Arabic) to lift her up so she could touch the ceiling, and remembered doing that with my own Dad. And even though they speak a completely different language, their language of love is still the same. It is during these times- just sitting there holding these precious children close, listening to this little girl recite the whole 23rd Psalm in Arabic with her face all lit up- these are the moments that I feel my heart healing just a little bit more.
February 1st was also a new and fun cultural experience. My very first Egyptian wedding, I got to be a part of the bridal party! :) A co-worker and friend asked me to be a bridesmaid in her wedding. It was a fun experience- being the only foreigner in the bridal party and having absolutely no idea what I was supposed to do. The ceremony was so different than ours at home. NO rehearsal- you just fly by the seat of your pants. :) The bride and bridesmaids were 30-40 minutes late, and I was the only one there when we were about to start. We followed her down the aisle and randomly found a place to stand up front. The whole service was in the Coptic language and they gave the bride and groom these little robes and crowns to wear. They looked like King and Queen. Everyone got up and walked around throughout the whole ceremony- going up to take pictures of everything going on. So comical. At one point, the groom leaned over to me and asked me to go find an English Bible. I was a little hesitant to wander about the church during the ceremony, so we sent someone else. And when we finally found one, they set it on the bench and never used it! Anyway, all that to say, I am learning, and learning, and learning. :) Sometimes it gets overwhelming, but Dad is faithful always to bring me back to the simplicity of life. Keep asking Him about me when you think about it! And thank you so much for your faithful support. Don't forget to share YOUR stories with ME. I love story time! Especially when it has to do with Dad's work in people's lives. Keep them coming.
